Table of Contents
Essay 1: What I Know
Essay 2: Taking A Side
Essay 3: Inquiry to Occupy
Essay 4: Book Club
**Essay reflections are found in the comments section under each post.**
Monday, May 20, 2013
Introductory Statement: Essay 4
Finally, essay 4 – the book club essay! Referring to
our book club discussions, the presentation, and our own general understanding
of the book club text, we were asked to make an essay that would help us
organize our thoughts on whether or not we would recommend the book to the future
students of English 100. Reading through the chapters, while skipping through
some, I have gained some knowledge about what the book is all about and the
author’s main argument. With these in mind, we were able to integrate all the
ideas in our own discussion of the book club text – along with our experiences
as readers.
Introductory Statement: Essay 3
In Essay 3, the main concern of our topic revolves
around the Occupy Movement. To generate a deeper understanding regarding the
issue, we had to make use of our skills in researching and reading articles
which was also administered from our previous essay. By formulating several questions that relate to the Occupy
movement, it was easier for us to choose which articles to use in the bulk of
our essay. Since the main purpose of this essay was mainly to inform the
audience about the movement in the style of inquiry,
we had yet to compare the articles – through the writers’ way of answering the
questions. In addition, we had to refrain from taking a side and instead, inquire
some information from the varied viewpoints in the least bias way possible.
Introductory Statement: Essay 2
The main theme for Essay 2 is “Taking a Side”,
meaning we were asked to come up with three different perspectives, all of
which respond to one certain issue of public concern, and analyze each of them
according to our own critical assessment.
In the end, we had to incorporate all the ideas and comparisons of the
three articles, and conclude which among them claimed to be the most persuasive. The importance of using
quotes for textual support emerges in Essay 2 since we were dealing with
research-based articles. In reference to that, we had to know how to integrate
quotes and organize our sentences following the topic-evidence-explanation
format.
Opening Statement
Going over the Syllabus once again, I tried to recall the different topics that were discussed in class especially with the assigned readings and written homeworks. Compared to the previous English/ESL class which most of us took last semester, English 100 is far more complex and can be challenging because we get to deal with non-fiction books, articles and arguments that connect us to the outside world by requiring us to think critically and improve our skills in mature reasoning based on various contexts. As stated in the second paragraph of the introduction in the Syllabus, “reading as a writer entails thinking seriously about a text’s rhetorical situation” and by rhetorical – it means that we are being called out, as writers, to examine the arguments and deliberately express our own ideas as a class. I was pretty excited to take on a higher level of college academic writing before starting English 100, though I know it would require more "sleepless nights" and spending my breaks at the "writing center". Being able to absorb these bits of information and improve my skills through a witty, well-informed professor + friendly classmates made learning a fun and enjoyable experience. How hard can it be?
Introductory Statement: Essay 1
For the “What I Know” essay, we were to express in
expository writing about a topic in which we were already knowledgeable. For
most of us, we chose to discuss a topic based on our own interests and passion.
Our target audience were addressed to either the uninformed or informed, giving
them a brief background of the topic we were to discuss. The use of a conversational opening was necessary to
successfully approach the information needed by our audience, while applying
the important concepts in expository writing. Before creating our first draft,
we were given an assigned reading of “The Rock Lexicon” by Chuck Klosterman to guide
us in formulating our own ideas towards Essay 1.
Closing Statement
During my first days in Mr. Hayes’ class, I felt as if the class was going to be tougher and obviously more challenging than my previous English class. The first few assigned works that were given gave me an idea of what to expect in the days to come throughout the semester – Doable, yet quite stressful. Along the way, I was able to see my own improvement in both reading and writing. The bulk of the class consisted of several readings that pushed me to think critically and analyze carefully through and through. I also started to get used to the everyday-homework schedule and be able to manage my time in the most productive manner. The Peer Evaluation and Think/Pair discussions helped during the progress of our essays because each of us acted out as the audience to our peers, judging each other’s essays and giving out essential feedback for improving. Being able to write formally in the higher academic level can be overwhelming, especially when we’re still on the process of adjusting in the “college life”, but when we get to participate actively, devoting our precious time in reading, writing, and listening – we can easily comprehend what we learn inside the classroom and apply it later on in our lives.
Mr. Hayes is one awesome and respectable professor, and really kind too! He has helped me boost up my confidence in my own works, regardless of whether you are non-native speaker or one who only uses English as his/her second language. There may have been a series of day-to-day assigned readings and homework, but in the end, you get to realize that in order for you to learn, you have to be pushed a little harder to be able to think deeper. Thank you, Jordan!
Mr. Hayes is one awesome and respectable professor, and really kind too! He has helped me boost up my confidence in my own works, regardless of whether you are non-native speaker or one who only uses English as his/her second language. There may have been a series of day-to-day assigned readings and homework, but in the end, you get to realize that in order for you to learn, you have to be pushed a little harder to be able to think deeper. Thank you, Jordan!
Reflection: Self to World
I
don’t think college should be entirely focused only on the expectations of
students. I believe that engaging ourselves in matters concerning the outside
world, even if some of us might find them as boring or out of own interests, is
part of our education. As college students, we should be willing to go beyond
our boundaries in order to learn. In my own experience, college-level writing with
a required number of words based on a topic that doesn’t really concern me was
extremely challenging during my first semester in college. It was hard at the
beginning, but as I continue to come across several assignments in class, I
seem to be making some progress on the way I think and write. During a
Think/Pair discussion about our levels of difficulty/ease from the opinion
column ‘Getting Nearer and Nearer’, I recall my peer saying that he didn’t
really understood the whole point of what he read since the topic doesn’t match
his own level of interest. I did agree with him, but at the same time, I think
it would be fair to give college a better approach by devoting our efforts even
if we don’t feel like doing it.
Reflection: Writing Process
During
the process of writing an essay or written response, I do it the traditional
way. The first thing to do is of course, reading. How can one get into writing
directly without doing reading first? By reading either the essay prompt or the
given text, I am able absorb the needed information that would guide me to the
next step which requires me to brainstorm some ideas by interpreting what I had
read and by sharing ideas with my peers or in public class discussions. After
coming up with the relevant ideas, I start to organize them in groups
consisting of bulleted list of ideas – using key terms to guide me as I make
the rough draft. Once I have made the draft, it’s time for some feedback.
Besides receiving professional help from my English instructor or the Writing
Center, I seek out for helpful comments from my peers inside or outside of
class to help me identify the areas that need improvement. Before proceeding
with the final draft – the final work I would want my audience to see, I have
to make the final touches. An extra hardcopy of the essay and a highlighter is
essential when editing and proofreading because it is easier to draw arrows
around, highlight or underline the words and phrases that seem out of place.
While doing these, I write along the correct terms or phrases so it would be
easier for me to edit them on the computer. This traditional approach in
writing is very effective, especially when constructing essays that are aimed
to a certain number of words.
Sunday, May 19, 2013
Essay 4: Final Draft
Mary
Anne Marrero
Mr.
Hayes
Eng 100 – 1:10
Eng 100 – 1:10
5/13/13
<<Extension>>
Word
Count: 1447
McDangerous
Sometimes,
we just can’t get enough of fast food. Those bright-lighted logos that we pass
through along the roads almost anywhere we go, the stimulating colors that
welcome you once you step into the doorway, and even the irresistible smell of
cheeseburgers and fries passing through the tip of your nose can make your stomach
twist and turn, craving. It’s cheap, fast, convenient, but it can also be
life-threatening. In the most recent years, the popularity of fast food around
the world has slowly been increasing, pushing beyond the limits of its
consumers and vastly expanding it to the young ones of the next generation. As
a child, I was fond of collecting toys that came with a McDonalds’ Happy Meal,
but now that I have grown out of it, I know that it’s just about time to raise
more awareness regarding the fast food and its industry. Even though fast food
has been known to be bad for our health, only knowing the fact that it is ‘bad’
won’t make an impact on what we eat. By examining the different components that
lie behind its alluring and appetizing look, we can then question ourselves on
whether or not we should keep eating fast food.
As an investigative journalist and
author of several published books, Eric Schlosser takes into account a
repulsive outlook on the fast food industry through his book, Fast Food Nation: The Dark Side of the
All-American Meal. He starts off with the history and the first fast food
pioneers, to the production and conditions of the employees, down to its global
influence. The purpose of the book is to inform the readers about the cruelty of
fast food corporations and to make them realize the pitfalls that come along
with the production. Schlosser argues that the continuous emergence of fast
food is sought to affect the youth, the way animals are being treated, and the fact
that it is slowly taking over what used to be viewed as healthy in our society.
He presents his argument in the style of “convincing” as mentioned in Chapter 9
of Aims of Argument where in the audience consists of readers whose
positions on a particular matter differ from the one another or those who have
no position at all. To establish the structure of his case, he provides his
claim, while further applying some key concepts used in Critique (Aims,
chapter 4). Fast Food Nation is a
thought-provoking and very informative read that grasps the bad sides of fast
food and the industry it holds, along with statements that behold its impact to
the world. Although he renders out the dark side of the all-American meal,
including some very relevant sources, he doesn’t acknowledge some of the good influences
of fast food to the world, such as the economy. Even so, I would still recommend
Fast Food Nation to readers in the higher-level, mostly because it
contains bits and pieces of information that could lead them, as well as their
peers, to interesting discussions by enabling them to go deeper into the
subject and to be able to analyze them further.
Fast Food Nation
is divided into two parts, the American Way, which talks about the history of
fast food, the restaurant pioneers, and the techniques and strategies adhered
to attract more consumers. Under this part are sub-chapters discussing the life
of a young Carl Karcher, founder of Carl’s Jr. Restaurant, and his
contributions that help unravel the world of fast food during the post-World
War Era. Along the way, Schlosser discusses brief technological innovations
through the years that have influenced not only our
everyday lives, but also
the development of the fast food industry. He examines the qualities starting
from the earliest to the most recent facts that revolve around these
convenient, yet unhealthy food. He mentions that, “As franchises and chain
stores opened across the United States, driving along a retail strip became a
shopping experience much like strolling down the aisle of a supermarket.” (97)
Because of the intense and rapid growth in the number of fast food restaurants,
it has become a standard, most especially in the American culture. I agree with
Schlosser point because I have witnessed it myself that in almost every place,
there is at least one franchise of a famous fast food restaurant. It may seem
contrary to think that the sudden popularity of the automobile in the U.S has
something to do with the continuous changes in the industry of fast food, but
it sure does. The other half of the book discusses about the production of meat
in slaughterhouses, as well as the lives of typical employees in fast food
restaurants, approaching the end of the book with a chapter discussing the
influence of fast food towards today’s generation and to other cultures outside
the U.S as well. The restaurant industry doesn’t only use view children as
their most targeted costumers, but even the young and lower class employees
that work in fast food restaurants as well. Schlosser adds to this by
mentioning words like, “sad and rootless anomie” (80) to illustrate the vicious
pattern of the fast food industry. Most fast food restaurants are common
workplaces for teenagers because of the fact that it pays minimum wage and it
doesn’t necessarily require high-level skills in order to work. Reading this, I
thought of how it’s entirely possible for fast food corporations to ruin the
future of these workers.
In my copy of the book Fast Food Nation, I see several places
where I have annotated paragraphs with quite a few words such as, “sick!” and
“gross”. The second half of the book was the most shocking to me, because
it focuses on the actual food and its production, not just the presence of corruption
and exploitation in the industry. Schlosser’s book served as an
eye-opener with a unique delivery through the presentation of facts, along with
a touch of poignancy to it. Unique and well-organized, the book reveals
how the production of fast food molds the way people eat. “You are what you
eat!” becomes an appalling echo across America after reading the book, inducing
us to take a closer look and examine the things we take in everyday with extra
caution. As I said, I would recommend this book to future students of the
English 100 class for academic reading, since it beholds a great lesson to the
most of us, and it can probably alter the way we think about fast food – in a
good way.
Works Cited:
Schlosser,
Eric. “Fast Food Nation: The Dark-Side of the All-American Meal.” 2012.
Boston: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 2003. Print.
Crusius,
Timothy W., and Carolyn E. Channell. The Aims of Argument: A Brief Guide. 7th
ed. Print.
Peer Evaluation for Cuihua
Mary Anne Marrero
Mr. Hayes
Eng 100 -1:10
4/12/2013
Word Count: 511
Peer Evaluation for Cuihua Lin
Reverse Outline:
¶
|
Notes on Form or Organization
|
Brief Notes on Content
|
1
|
Introduction
|
Introduces the topic by briefly
giving some information about Occupy. Introduces the sources.
|
2
|
Body ¶
|
Discussion of first source –
Sekar and Soung’s view.
|
3
|
Body ¶
|
Discussion of second source –
Armoundian’s view.
|
4
|
Body
¶
|
Asks the main question [?] and
directs it to the 2 sources, Sekar/Soung and Armoundian.
|
5
|
Body
¶
|
Asks another question and
discusses Harrison’s perspective.
|
Global:
§ I see that the main approach of
this paper revolves around two questions, although I’m not quite sure what the general
question is.
§ The topic, which explores how the
Occupy Movement takes on success, sounds pretty interesting.
§ The comparisons between the
perspectives seems like they are lacking something. You might want to put a bit
more of your own insights about the topic without taking a side on one
particular source.
§ You might need some connections
that would help in the comparing and contrasting of the three sources on your
paper.
Organization:
§ It seems like the intro and
discussion of Laird Harrison’s perspective is off-course from the two other
sources. Try including his perspective on the 3rd or 4th
paragraph to put some balance between the perspectives.
§ The paper sounds a little like a
summary rather than an exploration. Try ordering the question logically,
discussing the causes and effects based on the question.
§ Try integrating the three sources
after asking the first question. In that way, Harrison’s perspective wouldn’t
look like it was left out.
§ You might want to add paragraphs
that talk about the connection between the three sources – and also to make it
look like it wasn’t a rigid, high-school-style-5 paragraph driven essay.
§ I like the way each of the sources
were introduced adequately just like that of the student sample on Aims Chapter 8 (p. 202-204)
§ Creating some transition paragraphs
between the paragraphs that discuss the perspectives might help in coming up
with the required word count (1250-1500 words).
Paragraph:
Paragraph:
§ I like how the
topic-evidence-explanation concept was applied in this paper, although I think
the topic seems to be lacking some specification.
§ Great work on conveying the “They Say” part, but you might need o
express a little more of you “I Say”.
§ The last paragraph looks like a
body paragraph because it talks about Harrison’s own view on topic.
§ I don’t see a relation between the
evidence in paragraph 3 with the question being asked. Try addressing it
further; explain how Maria Armoundian answers the question.
§ Refer to Aims Chapter 8 (p. 198-201) to get more ideas about what to put in
the conclusion paragraph.
§ You might want to add a more
explanation as to how the quotation answers the question.
§ In the introduction, consider
narrowing your focus on your own exploration of the Occupy movement or you
could open with your own view before reading.
§ The last paragraph beholds another
question, how does Sekar/Soung and Amourdian’s address this question?
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